Slipping my tie into place, I hurried to the door, wondering as I went who could be knocking. Having allowed myself to be cajoled into attending a musical event and subsequent reception at the local university, I was running late, and already frustrated at having to wear a coat and tie, which were not my usual Friday night attire.
Since my wife's death from cancer the previous year, my well-meaning friends made regular efforts to 'include me', which I generally refused even though I appreciated their kindness. But this night I agreed to go, and because of a problem at work, was now in danger of making everyone late. Reaching the door, I flung it open expecting to see some kid selling raffle tickets or school candy, and thinking unkindly that I needed to get rid of them as quickly as possible. My voice already forming an abrupt greeting, I froze in my tracks.
Sarah stood on my porch, looking away shyly, as if she might bolt at any second. A young lady who counted among my favorite people in the world, my spontaneous joy at seeing her immediately erased my irritation, but did little to hide my utter surprise. In all the years I had known her, Sarah had never come to my door alone, and I found myself looking towards the driveway for her mother. But she appeared to be truly alone, and I realized, truly embarrassed, though I had no idea why.
Her simple presence at my door was shock enough, but her attire only compounded my surprise. Sarah was an athlete of some renown in our area, and it was widely accepted that she would attend the college of her choice on a soccer scholarship. She was that good, and it was a point of personal pride for me, since I had the privilege of coaching her for two formative years.
From the day I first met Sarah, standing shyly behind her mother on a soccer field at age nine, I had seen her in a dress one time. Her standard attire was athletic, and her trademark was Adidas, a company she could very likely represent in the future.
Tonight, however, she wore a summer dress of dark blue, with a small flower print. It was lightweight cotton, buttoned from top to bottom in the front, and showed definitively that Sarah had transformed from a young girl to a young woman. Her legs were encased in nylons, and she wore sandals with tall heels, which exaggerated the muscles in her calves unnecessarily. Her hair was pulled up and back and she had curled the ends. Though Sarah typically did little to enhance her appearance, I always knew she was a pretty girl. Seeing her now, she took my breath away.
As greetings go, it was pretty inadequate, my surprise apparent. She turned away slightly, looking completely unsure of herself. Sarah was never talkative, and in fact went through a troubled period when she hardly spoke at all, so her silence wasn't completely unexpected, but tonight there was more to it.
I was about to make a mistake and I knew it. In a short period I had moved from irritation for having agreed to attend the concert, to frustration at being interrupted when I was already late, to the combination of joy and surprise at seeing Sarah at my door, and the emotional roller coaster was disorienting at best. So with some effort I attempted to regain my composure since it was clear there was something was on Sarah's mind, and knowing her history better than most, offering her assistance needed to be my first priority. Nevertheless, my next question seemed to be as poorly thought out as my first utterance.
'How did you get here?'
She looked up shyly. 'I'm staying at Renee's tonight.'
Renee lived on the other side of the neighborhood, and again I found myself looking about, expecting to see her, but Sarah was alone.
'Is everything OK?'
Suddenly Sarah was shaking, and it wasn't until later that I would realize she was simply nervous. Her eyes glistened with moisture, and I thought she might be about to cry.
'Yes....yes. I just... just wanted to say hi.'
She bounced slightly on the balls of her feet as my concern for her deepened. Since the loss of my wife I had become detached from the happenings around town, but I understood from others that Sarah's mom had settled down in the past year and cleaned up her act, so to speak.
I had helped Sarah through many difficult times in the past, all resulting from her mom's behavior, and perhaps the troubles had returned. Stepping out on to the porch to comfort Sarah, I reached for her and then I froze, remembering our history. And then it hit me.
It was as if the atmosphere around me had become devoid of oxygen, I could scarcely breath. The realization must have shown on my face and in that instant Sarah relaxed somewhat, giving me a weak smile, and I knew for certain. Though Sarah was 25 years my junior, I had always teased her about being a day older than I was. Tomorrow was my birthday, meaning today was hers. She was 15 years old.
Some say that in certain circumstances time can literally stand still. Standing on the porch, looking into Sarah's frightened eyes, my arms extended, two and a half years of memories flashed through my mind in a blur. Two and one half years of regretting, and nurturing, one of the most incredible memories of my life. My mind flashed back as if it was yesterday.
It was fall, and twelve year old Sarah was starting her second year on the soccer team I coached. I loved the game and got involved coaching at the local association, even though I had no kids of my own. The team had shaped up the previous year into a pretty good side and was very successful, and Sarah was well-established as a star striker. This was a particularly significant accomplishment given that she was the only girl on an all-boys team, playing in a boy's league.
I broke the rules of convention, and of the club I served in, when I recruited Sarah onto my boy's team, but I did it for two reasons; she had the capability, and she was an eleven year old child in need. Her parents were embroiled in a particularly bitter divorce, seemingly unaware or unconcerned about the harm their public displays of hatred and rage were causing their daughter.
Then her father essentially disappeared, and her mother expressed her spite for her missing mate by becoming the town drunk, and the town slut. By the time I took Sarah under my wing, she was completely withdrawn. Only God knew the emotional turmoil that must have existed within her, for her line of defense was formed by silence, and despite my best efforts, she would not open up.
Soccer was her salvation, and she poured her spirit into the game. She loved the sport, and it loved her back, giving her the outlet she needed to survive the turmoil that was her life. I could see the lack of focus and commitment that marked the girl's team in her age group simply added another frustration to Sarah's list of many, and fought my club leadership for the right to get her the challenge that her abilities, and her needs, required.
Once the club relented, Sarah was always the first to practice, and the last to leave, setting the standard for work ethic in a group of boys that included few slackers. Her mother could care less which team Sarah played on as long as it didn't disrupt her own pathetic life, and when she became unreliable as transportation, I took the time to pick Sarah up and take her home, quite often finding a highly intoxicated and ungrateful mother waiting upon our return.
It was not unusual for a week to go by with hardly a word between Sarah and I. She was content in her silence, and I quickly learned not to press. In the course of the first year, Sarah made it clear in her own ways that she understood and appreciated my efforts, and ever so slowly, she opened up. The first tiny smiles I got from her were like gold, and I cherished them as I worked for the next one. Then we started to talk, or more accurately Sarah did, at times just telling me things at the most unexpected moment, as if the thoughts had to be released before she lost her nerve.
Sometimes it was just a sentence or two, sometimes it was more, and I listened patiently, letting her set her own pace. Over time I deduced that her mother was drunk nearly every night and entertaining many different men, sometimes more than one visiting at a time. Her mother apparently made no effort to hide her behavior. While I didn't pry further, I could only imagine what Sarah and her baby sister were exposed to in the small three room apartment they lived in. My loathing for her mother gradually turned to hatred, yet I could say nothing, knowing from an early effort that she would respond by taking Sarah away.
Unable to correct Sarah's entire world, I did the best I could with the small part I controlled, offering her simple friendship and the outlet of soccer. As my reward, she started smiling again, at when she was on the pitch. I came to love Sarah as if she was my own, and the protective net I cast around her became a personal obsession for me. I wanted to do everything possible to offer her a chance at the joy life should bring to a beautiful girl, now twelve years old.
To be totally honest, I must say that Sarah also rewarded my efforts in another way, one that meant a lot to me on a different level, considering the pride I took in the team I coached. Sarah personally ripped apart every opponent we played, as if they somehow were the cause of all her worries. As our leading scorer, she was formidable in front of the goal.
Our team traveled quite often, looking for the best competition, and Sarah's mom was quick to let her go alone, no doubt eager to have one less child to care for over the weekend. It was never a problem to get one of the other mothers to accept Sarah into their hotel room, and whenever we were on the road I looked after her as a father would. The time in question that caused my flashback was different, however. Quite different indeed.
It was late in the fall, with State Cup looming big in the spring. When the season resumed after the winter break, we were going to make a run, I could feel it. My team had silently risen from the masses and, in my opinion, had the potential to win it all. To be ready, we needed to play the best competition available. So when I heard that the current state champion, plus the team thought to be a top contender, had both signed up for a tournament on the far side of the state, and that one more team was needed to make a bracket, I changed our plans and entered.
Many of the parents howled at the sudden schedule change since it required overnight stays on short notice. To alleviate their concerns, I agreed to organize a way to take most of the players without their parents, since they had already made other commitments. Two other parents volunteered to help, and we split the team, each of them bunking four kids in their room, and me taking seven. My plan was simple; with seven players plus myself, we would rent two adjoining rooms and literally camp out.
Sarah was one of the seven, and once we arrived the complications this created were suddenly apparent. Sarah had never stayed with me on a trip, and I failed to consider that a budding young girl, even a tom-boyish athlete like Sarah, needed some degree of space between her and a pack of six rowdy boys.
In the end the solution was simple. The boys would use the two beds in one room, plus the sleeping bags they brought, and all stay together. They didn't want to be separated anyway. This left the other room with its two beds and bath for Sarah and me.
After a team dinner, we all retired to the boy's room to watch a movie and relax. We had a mid-morning game against the reigning state champion, so with the movie over it was lights out at 10:00 and everyone was required to go to bed. As Sarah and I made our preparations for bed, I closed the door between the two rooms to give Sarah as much privacy as possible, threatening the boys that I better not hear a sound. Even though I spent plenty of time around girls her age on the soccer fields, I did not have a daughter and felt awkward to be sharing a room with a young girl.
As Sarah changed in the bathroom and brushed her teeth, I set the clock and read a book, making every effort to become invisible and give Sarah all the space she may need. But even with my carefully measured efforts at nonchalance, I couldn't help but notice how cute she looked in the running shorts and T-shirt Sarah had chosen for sleeping. She settled in and we said our goodnights, and then cut the lights. Only after it was dark did I remove my shirt, since I can't stand to sleep in one. However, I left my nylon shorts on, which only seemed appropriate. With the boys quiet and a big day ahead, I was quickly asleep.
I really cannot say what time of night it was when Sarah crawled into my bed. Dead to the world, I vaguely remember someone cuddling up to me, their back to my front, and my arm instinctively wrapping around the warm body only to be grabbed and held close. In retrospect, I've rationalized that deeply asleep, I thought it was my wife who curled up next to me. She and I often slept as close as two spoons in a drawer, so it wasn't unusual to feel a warm body close to my own, and it was pure reflex that I pressed close.
Again I cannot say how much time went by, but my first clear recollection was suddenly passing from sleep to total alertness. Perhaps my senses had been trying to send me signals, to pierce the sleep induced fog in my head, for in an instant I knew that it was Sarah pressed up hard against my body, her back against my chest, her butt pressed hard against my crotch, our legs intertwined. She had hold of my arm, which wrapped around her, and held my hand firmly against her chest.
My nose was nuzzled into her hair. From slumber to panic in mere seconds, I pulled my head back in recoil, stunned by my involuntary but grossly inappropriate and intimate position against Sarah. But as I pulled away, her grip on my arm tightened, and just as quickly I became concerned for her. Was she troubled in her sleep? Was she having bad dreams? With my knowledge of her personal life, I realized that she probably crawled in my bed seeking comfort.
The entire awakening and reaction took but a few seconds, and my breathing was hard but relieved as I realized that despite the inappropriate nature of the situation, I had not done anything wrong. I needed to wake up and relax, then figure out how to correct things. My heart was pounding so hard in my chest that surely Sarah could feel it, and the obvious first step was to settle down. As relief spread through me, I began to slowly unwind my legs from Sarah's.
I had no intention of depriving Sarah of the comfort she was seeking, but I needed to do it from a more appropriate distance. If anyone were to see us entwined together in bed as we were, there would be no explanation suitable, even to someone who knew how much Sarah looked to me for help.
As I moved my legs, I tried to determine if Sarah was awake, but concluded she was not. Our legs apart, I slid my body back a few inches, and then tried to retract my arm from her grip. My plan was to slip over to my own side of the bed, and leave my hand on her shoulder so she would know that I was there. As I tried to extract my hand, her grip tightened and she pulled my arm to her chest, her butt sliding right back up against my body.
No doubt this was an involuntary reaction from a sleeping Sarah, but the result was impossible to ignore. Pressing my hand against her chest as she was, I suddenly realized I could feel Sarah's tiny right breast under my palm, through her T-shirt. The panic returning, I knew I needed to move my hand, but the sleeping girl was holding on tightly, as if my hand and arm was a favored stuffed animal she slept with. At the same time, I was acutely aware of the feel of her breast. Small as it was, the shape and form were clear to me, and I found myself to be horrified by the tingle of excitement this unexpected and unplanned contact was giving me.
To be honest, it was not the first time for me to notice Sarah's budding breasts. During the previous spring, I had my first glimpse of them, quite by accident. We were playing small-sided games, and Sarah sat next to me on the bench after I substituted her off the field. In a style popular with girl players, Sarah had the sleeves of her jersey tied up on her shoulders with clips made specifically for that purpose. This left her arms fully exposed to the sun. In this case, with the baggy jersey, this also left a large gap under her arm.
Hot and tired, and sitting on my left, Sarah leaned forward to watch the game, and when she did I was unexpectedly presented with a clear view of her tiny right breast. At that time it was barely more than a nipple and aureole, but her breast was clearly budding out from her chest and I couldn't help but stare at it. She sat in this manner for a full five minutes, then got up to re-enter the game. Unable to look away and excited more than I wanted to admit, it wasn't until she arose that I felt a sudden wave of shame and guilt for my voyeuristic opportunism.
In the second half, Sarah took a seat to my right, again leaning forward in the same manner. My eyes moved to the jersey opening immediately, and I was not disappointed. There was her left breast, tiny and beautiful. Even though I felt guilty about my actions, I couldn't concentrate on anything else, and I couldn't look away. As discreetly as I could, I stared at her lovely immature breast until she moved.
For the remainder of the spring, and even this fall season, I looked for opportunities to repeat my voyeurism. And I found with a little effort, they did occur. Each time I felt the guilt, and I chastised myself afterwards, but I couldn't seem to stop myself. I even found that during stretching exercises, if I was in the correct position I was afforded a good look up Sarah's shorts. On many occasions, I got a good look at her panty covered pussy, and even learned that she favored a certain pair of silky aqua colored underwear.
Though Sarah never seemed to notice me looking down her shirt, a practice that ended when she began to wear a bra to practice, she did catch me looking at her legs and panties a few times. The first time she turned her body so I lost my view, but after that she merely looked away as if she didn't notice, maintaining her position. Even though I noticed this, I assumed she just didn't realize what I was looking at, and each time I moved eventually away embarrassed and trying not to let it show.
Knowing Sarah's history, I was merciless in chastising myself for exploiting her innocence in my mind. After practice it was pure denial for me, but each session I would again find myself looking for opportunities. Even though the guilt was overwhelming, I couldn't seem to stop. So it was easy to understand my panicked reaction at first finding Sarah snuggled intimately against my body, and now finding my hand accidentally on her breast. To feel even a hint of pleasure in this circumstance was wrong, and I knew it.
Nevertheless, as I tried once again to pull my hand back, I knew I would remember the feel of Sarah's breast forever. Still quite small, she had grown enough that she was developing the full shape of a womanly breast, if not the magnitude. The nipple area was raised and pointed, and the flesh around the nipple was swollen and beginning to take shape. My mind was in turmoil, a mixture of horror and fascination, as I slowly slid my hand away.
Sliding my body away from Sarah once again as my hand was coming free I felt a sense of relief that I was doing the proper thing. But just as my fingers slipped past her tender breast, she reaffirmed her grip on my arm, pulling my hand once again firmly over her little bud, her butt once again wriggling up against my crotch, her back once again firm against my chest.
I didn't know what to do. Looking past Sarah's shoulders, I could see it was nearly 1:00 AM. I calculated a maximum of five minutes had passed since I awoke with a start, but it seemed like an eternity. I had to make a decision. Do I continue to try and casually remove myself from Sarah, while still offering some degree of comfort which she so obviously needed, or do I simply get up and move to the other bed? It was clear I needed to end this now. I was at the edge of the bed and could not move further to put distance between us.
Even as I made up my mind to move to the unoccupied bed, a remarkable thing happened. Sarah suddenly shifted, grinding her ass hard against my crotch and rubbing my hand tightly against her breast, then shifting it downward so I now touched her left breast. It was if she was stretching in her sleep, but the effect on me was instantaneous and devastating; in renewed horror I felt stiffening in my groin.
With my hand pressed firmly into Sarah's young breast, and her tiny ass driven tightly against my groin, my cock simply began to stir of its own accord. Willing it to stop, my breathing came to a halt, all my powers of concentration focused on my cock. But it was if I was a teen-ager again, trying not to get an erection at an inappropriate time, and finding that my awareness of the problem only made it worse.
My cock continued to swell. Had Sarah been awake, there was no doubt she would be able to feel the change, and I said a silent prayer of thanks for small favors. I now knew it was time to get up, but I had lost my resolve. Something deep inside of me enjoyed this situation, and I found my mind in a war, one side of my brain issuing warnings while the other side retaliated with rationalizations. She was, after all, asleep and unawares, right?
Sarah was pure athlete, her body lean and muscular. Quite often I had admired her, not in a sexual way, just simple admiration of her fitness, strength and endurance. She could hold her own with any of the boys she encountered on the field, yet that ability was encased in a much lovelier, graceful package.
In particular her firm brown legs set her apart from the boys on the field, and I knew from helping her with wraps, or from helping her work out cramps, that they were pure muscle over bone. To now feel my swelling cock pressed against her firm ass and thighs was intensely exciting, and I found my willingness to take advantage of her sleepy state growing much quicker than my commitment to act appropriately.
Yet once again I realized enough was enough, and I shifted my position, a prelude to getting up and changing beds. As soon as I moved, Sarah wiggled her ass back against my swelling cock, and she rubbed my hand back and forth across her breath. Now I lifted up so I could see her face, certain she must be awake, but Sarah's eyes were closed, her breathing subdued, and she looked contentedly asleep.
My heart was pounding again, but this time for a different reason. Her small breast suddenly felt incredible under my hand, as I strained my senses to memorize every feature. My cock, now all but totally hard, had worked itself into the crack of her ass, and even if she wasn't aware of it, I certainly was. Rational thought was a thing of the past. My body, and now my mind, had responded to the occasion. Was it possible Sarah was having a sexual dream? Did twelve year old girls think this way?
As if to answer my question, Sarah once again pressed her ass hard against my cock, the thin nylon of my shorts doing little to contain my excitement. Her hands slid my own palm off her left breast and back to the right. This time as my hand passed over her breast, I cupped it slightly, then released it quickly for fear she would notice. But her only reaction was to hold my hand more firmly against her.
Unsure of the meaning, I once again leaned over her, looking for signs of awakening. But in the faint light of the room, it seemed she was still asleep. On reflex, and without thinking of what I was doing, I lightly kissed the side of her head, only realizing what I had done when the clean smell of her hair filled my nostrils. Sarah let out a faint sigh.
Now I was really confused. Was she awake, or was she having a very good dream? I'm not so sure it mattered, my hard cock against her body and my hand on her breast was all my mind could focus on. I realized I was loving this.
I kissed the side and back of her head a few times; light, gentle kisses. Almost without thought, my hand started to move slightly against Sarah's small breast, now feeling her by my own actions, not hers. It was subtle, but obvious to me what I was doing, and probably to her if she was alert at all. I had a fear that if she was dreaming, than if she suddenly awakened there would be no explaining my actions. When another small sigh passed from her lips, however, all caution was cast aside.
Again I cupped her small breast, gently kneading her flesh and reveling in the small, firm hint of future womanhood. Her grip on my wrist lessened, and either consciously, or in her sleep, Sarah was allowing me do what I was doing. Growing bolder, I dropped my hand downward, covering Sarah's left breast again, and Sarah shifted slightly so I had more room, and her grip lessened even more. That was it; I was now officially over the edge.
In a bold act that I still cannot rationalize even today, I moved decisively past the point of no return. Thinking that I could conceal myself in the darkness if she should awaken and be alarmed by what I was doing, I pulled my hand from her breast, this time with no resistance, and started to work my shorts and underwear down.
Laying on my side, with my left arm tucked under my pillow and head, it wasn't easy, yet slowly and carefully I eased my shorts down across my thighs, my calves, then off my feet. Drawing the clothing from under the covers, I dropped them to the floor beside the bed. Having been horrified by the situation I was in just a short time ago, I was now, by my own intent, totally naked, and sporting a raging hard-on, as I lay in a hotel room bed snuggled up with a beautiful twelve year old girl.
As I pressed against Sarah once again, I wasn't disappointed. She wormed her ass against me just like before as she guided my hand back to her chest. Now unconstrained, and hard as steel, my cock extended straight out, pressing into the crack of Sarah's ass, the head rubbing against her bare thighs. Sarah squirmed some more, and when she settled back down the end of my cock was trapped between her muscular thighs. I could feel the heat of her skin against my cock, and I could feel my heart pounding in my throat.
Certain now that she must be awake, I leaned forward once again, but in the darkness it was impossible to tell if she was feigning sleep or not. She gave no indication of being awake. My nakedness against her did not seem to trouble her, and it damn sure didn't trouble me. I kissed her cheek, and then her ear, then once again nuzzled into her hair as I rubbed my cock ever so slightly in the vice formed by her legs, stroking her right breast gently. I was very aware that what I was doing was wrong. I was very aware that what I was doing was illegal. And I was very aware that I did not intend to stop.
Having come this far, however, I was content to lay naked against Sarah and hold her breast until she awakened, or decided to move. To be honest, although I had noticed Sarah's youthful body, and had enjoyed, albeit amidst my denial, the voyeuristic opportunities I had around her, I really didn't know what to do. I had never considered having sex with someone a third my age, and I didn't know if a twelve year old girl could experience sexual pleasure as I understood it.
Thinking back to my own youth, I must have been 13 or 14 years old when I first came to understand how much fun sexual release could be. Confused as I was, the thing I knew for certain was that I would like to touch more of Sarah's body, to feel her youth and her strength, and to reach my hand into places I had scarcely the courage to consider. But I was afraid that she would come fully awake and be terrified by my behavior. So I settled in against her hard body, wedged my cock slowly back and forth between her thighs, and tried to understand every feature of her tender breasts under her shirt.
That's when Sarah escalated things. Her head tilted towards me slightly, and in the dim light filtering through the heavy curtains, I could see her eyes were now open, and I could swear a faint smile touched her lips. Her head settled back to the pillow with a sigh, and then her right hand released my wrist. I held my breath as she reached down, thinking for a second it was a reflex action and scared what might happen next. Then her hand settled on my hip, her fingers spreading across my bare skin.
She should have contacted my clothing, but instead she was touching me, and in a place where no twelve year old girl should touch a grown man, clothed or otherwise. I was almost certain it was deliberate, and was trying hard to decide, when she confirmed it. With the slightest amount of pressure, she encouraged movement in my hips, and I quickly realized she wanted me to resume the slight movement of my cock between her thighs.
To say I was incredulous would be a gross understatement. Not only was this young girl aware of my deviant behavior, she was actively encouraging it. It would only be upon reflection much later that I would realize she knew what she was doing from the very beginning. I'm not trying to say that Sarah seduced me, that it was all her idea and not my fault.
That would be unfair. She probably didn't exactly know where things would lead, but when I looked back I knew she had rubbed against me, and pulled my hand against her breast, on purpose. That I acted on it was my fault, and my fault alone, and all my weeks and months of recriminations that followed were well earned by my actions and lack of good moral judgment.
But as I say, all of this would occur to me much later. In the present, I could only think of one thing; this beautiful twelve year old girl did not mind my hand on her breast and my hard, naked cock between her legs.
My hip movements became more pronounced, and the feel of my cock slipping between Sarah's silky smooth and firm thighs was simply intoxicating. My hand on her breast became bolder as I no longer tried to conceal my behavior, and I moved from breast to breast with total abandon. They were so small, but so delightful. Pressing my face into her hair, I began to nibble at the edge of her ear, earning a small sigh for my trouble.
Through it all, Sarah said not a word. However, as she guided my hip with her hand, pressed her ass against me, clamped down with her thighs, and arched her breasts forward to meet my touch, the communication was clear. We were both enjoying what was happening.
I knew what I wanted to do next, and it only took me a moment to make up my mind. Yet still I hesitated, until I forced myself to act lest I chicken out. Reluctantly leaving Sarah's breasts, I slid my hand down in search of the hem of her T-shirt. When my hand slipped under and touched Sarah's belly, we both froze. For me, it was a watershed event, a contact with Sarah I could scarcely imagine.
I had touched Sarah's stomach before, either wrestling around, or perhaps helping her work through a drill on the field, but this was sexual contact. I froze to savor the moment, and to gather my courage. When Sarah stiffened against me, I had no way of knowing what she was thinking. So I held my position and waited for her reaction, aware that if she stopped me here, it would be wise and unsurprising. However, she made no move stop me, and in the stillness I could hear her breathing, and it had an excited edge to it. Knowing that I had to press on before I lost my nerve, I started to slide my hand upward ever so slowly.
Sarah was as physically fit as any person I knew, and as my hand encountered slight ripples in her hard stomach I knew it was the outline of muscles that I could only envy. My movements were slow, partly to savor the experience, and partly to give Sarah a chance to stop me. I was powerless to stop myself, and a part of me hoped that Sarah, the child, would make a mature and wise decision that this had gone far enough.
It was the only hope I had, the only possibility to keep me from doing something so wrong, so against my belief system. I needed Sarah to save me, and I must confess that I was very aware of this as I reached for her youthful breast. Stoked by desire, yet disturbed by an undercurrent of fear, my mind was in turmoil. I never wanted something so badly, and at the same time I never wanted to be denied so badly.
In the end Sarah did not stop me, and I did not stop myself. My hand encountered Sarah's rib cage, and I pressed on more urgently. It was a race now to touch Sarah intimately, my mature hand against her immature breast, before the guilt and shame I was feeling could take root and bring me to my senses. Sarah rolled slightly, invitingly, towards me, offering me access and making it plainly known she wanted it to happen as well. And I did not disappoint her.
With greed and determination, in defiance of the rational part of my brain, I covered Sarah's right breast with my hand. It was so tiny under my large hand, hardly more than a swelling in her skin topped by a small nipple, but it was heavenly. I cupped her gently, my fingers mere collateral as my palm totally covered her, and in that instant I was born again. The guilt and the shame, having suffered an embarrassing and total defeat, retreated quickly, and like a spoiled child that always gets what he wants, I relished the immoral victory.
Sarah simply sighed in contentment. Not the least bit troubled by my actions, her hand once again compelled my hip to move as I caressed her budding breast. It was a fabulous feeling, touching her in this way, and even though it was an inappropriate touch between a grown man and a pre-teen girl, I unconsciously did all I could to express the tenderness and love I felt for her through my hand. This was not the groping, threatening sex between a child molester and his victim. It was true fascination and adoration, and I could barely breathe.
When I eased my hand over to her left breast, Sarah once again shifted to give me better access. It was a subtle move, but it was reassuring, letting me know she did not mind. That I, the adult and chaperone, was requiring reassurance from one of my primary charges, was totally lost on me at the moment. Her tiny left breast was my total focus, every bit as divine as the right, and I carefully studied every square millimeter with my fingers.
Small as it was, I could still detect the outline of a budding breast, the soft flesh in distinct contrast to Sarah's otherwise rock-hard body. Using my fingertips to tease her young nipple, it did not respond and stiffen as I was accustomed, and I assumed this was due to her age and immaturity. But there was no doubt that area around her nipple puffed up in response to my stimulation, and this turned me on.
The immoral beast in me, whose existence I did not even appreciate until this night, had taken over completely. I was naked and aroused, my cock as hard as it had ever been, and I was in bed with a beautiful and willing girl. That she was significantly underage and totally inexperienced was no longer a concern, it was a source of excitement. Leaning in I kissed Sarah's cheek as I fondled her budding breasts, then I nibbled and licked at her ear, causing her to giggle. Then I simply did what had to be done.
Moving my hand from her breasts, I took hold of the bottom of Sarah's shirt and lifted it up her body. My left arm was still trapped under me, so it was once again awkward, but Sarah merely lifted up and helped me out. Her T-shirt fluttered to the floor as she settled back against me, the warmth of her naked back feeling heavenly against my chest. She was now topless, and my hands moved freely from breast to breast. However, I had not yet achieved my objective.
Disengaging my cock from Sarah's thighs, a place it surely did not wish to leave, I rolled her flat on her back, lying alongside my body. We were now eye to eye, and with my eyes well adjusted to the darkness, I could easily see the expectation on her face. I looked deep into her eyes, trying to express the love and caring I felt for her, trying to let her know that this was as much an earth-shattering event for me as it was for her, and she did not look away. When I leaned in to kiss her lips, she turned her head slightly to meet me.
Over the years I had shared hugs with Sarah, and had kissed her on the cheek on several occasions, when it was appropriate. She had even once kissed me on the cheek when she was leaving a school function, a rare sign of affection that a very withdrawn Sarah showed few people, and it had imprinted my heart like few individual acts had ever done. But this was different. Our lips met gently, but with a passion that I could easily sense, and was certain she could as well. It was a sweet kiss, so tender, and we repeated it over and over.
Perhaps Sarah had kissed a boy before now, but I seriously doubted it, and I was fully aware that this may be the first romantic kiss of her life. I could say I put so much effort into making it memorable because I wanted her first kiss to be special, but in reality it was the most romantic kiss of my life. The moment our lips first touched, it was electric for me, and the subsequent kisses were instinctive, reflexive, and quite honestly out of my control. I couldn't help myself, I wanted as much of this as I could get.
When I finally held a kiss, then parted my lips and touched hers with my tongue, Sarah wasn't totally surprised. She parted her lips and let me in, unintentionally mocking my efforts to indoctrinate her to passionate kissing gently. As my tongue sought out hers, I remembered the stories she once shared of her drunken mother bringing guys home and not caring what Sarah and her sister saw. So perhaps she knew what to expect, but I was certain that this was more loving than anything she had witnessed. Or at least I tried to make it so.
At first, kissing Sarah with my tongue was sloppy.
Ever the smart girl, Sarah made no effort to act as if she knew what to do. Instead, she followed my actions, and before long we were kissing deeply and passionately. It wasn't perfect, but it was incredible. My right hand played at her breasts, and my throbbing cock lay across her thighs, my hot skin touching hers, and I felt I could kiss her forever. But my cock ached for attention, and I had other plans, so I broke away, tracing a line of kisses under Sarah's chin and around her neck.
Trying hard to see my targets in the dark, I lifted up to shift my body down the bed. As I did, Sarah's hand, which had been lying across her stomach, reached out and came into contact with my cock for the first time. Over my life, my cock had been touched many times, by different women, under many different circumstances, but never could I remember a touch that struck me to my core like Sarah's did.
I froze as her inexperienced hand fumbled at my member, wanting to shout with joy when her young fingers wrapped around me. But as it was, I was committed to the move I was making, and now knowing that Sarah was willing to touch me sexually, I had the confidence of knowing her hand would be back. Pulling away from her hand as I slipped down, she let out a small groan of disappointment, but I suspected that in a matter of moments her regrets would be forgotten.
Barely able to breathe, barely able to think straight, I resumed my kisses at Sarah's neck, then traced a line across her breast bone. She sensed right away what I was up to, and I felt her body stiffen, not in fear I now knew, but in anticipation. Teasing her as I rubbed my aching cock against her legs, I kissed all around her breasts, drawing near, but each time turning away. Her chest began to rise in anticipation, then collapse with a sigh each time I changed direction.
She was imploring me to consummate the act with her body, and I loved the power I felt at arousing a young girl, this young girl, in this way. My right hand traced lines along Sarah's stomach as I teased, dipping down often to follow the elastic at the top of her shorts. Finally sensing she was ready to pop, and unable to resist any longer, my mouth smothered her right breast.
It was intensely erotic, suckling this tender, immature breast. As my mouth recorded the distinct differences between Sarah's small breast and my wife's large, full one, I realized for the first time that I was cheating on my wife. But I didn't care, and in fact I marveled at the thought that after tasting this exotic fruit, I may never be satisfied with my wife's breasts again.
This was a wild thought since my wife's well formed breasts were objects of desire to many of our male friends, but sucking Sarah's little breast was that erotic. The moment my mouth touched her, I was hooked. My lips traced the swollen flesh that would one day be a full, womanly breast, and my tongue teased a nipple that would one day stand up rigid and proud. And Sarah sighed blissfully, the most contented and happy sound I had heard from her lips in years.
Moving from left to right, I devoured her breasts with complete abandon as I ground my cock into her legs and rubbed my hand across her stomach. Sarah lay passively, and I could sense her hands felt awkward to her, that she didn't know what she should do with them. I wanted to will her to use them to guide my head, to show me what she liked, but my telepathy failed, and I knew such experience would come for her at a later age. Anyway, I had another objective that needed my attention.
Focusing now on Sarah's right breast, I dipped my hand down, allowing my fingertips to trail down under the elastic band on Sarah's shorts, testing the waters. She stiffened, but again I knew it wasn't a bad thing. Not a word had passed between us, but we were communicating well, and with absolute confidence that Sarah was willing, I slid my hand down into her shorts.
My urgency was greater now, but it was still an easy matter to make myself move slowly. The love I felt for Sarah, the awe I felt at touching her beautiful young body, was real and easily expressed. My hand slipped into her shorts, and my fingers then slipped beneath the elastic of her panties. In the darkness, I wondered if they were aqua, then I wondered if I would ever know. It didn't matter; the sense of touch was all I needed.
As soon as my fingers felt the rise of Sarah's mons veneris, I paused my explorations and merely savored. My hand was inside Sarah's shorts, inside Sarah's panties, and mere inches from her young pussy. It was intense, the mere mental imagery of what I was doing enough to push me over the edge. If I stopped here, I knew I would happily jerk off for weeks just thinking of what would have happened next. However, I knew I wouldn't stop, and I knew Sarah wouldn't stop me.
My mouth was still on Sarah's breast, but my sucking had stopped, my concentration lost. Sarah seemed to have stopped breathing. The Earth may well have quit spinning. My fingers had not encountered pubic hair, and not sure at what age a young girl developed hair on her pussy, I was tempted to rush my movements to learn if she was still totally bald.
I would have to lie to say that the prospect of touching a beautiful and eager girl who was still too young to have developed pubic hair wasn't the most exciting sexual experience of my life. How easily I had become a pedophile was lost on me, and what impact it would have on my later life, or Sarah's, wasn't a consideration. This was intensely arousing, and I was hopelessly lost.
Resisting the urge to find out if her pussy was totally bare, I instead moved sideways, tracing my fingers off Sarah's mons into the valley created by the rise of hip bone. I ran my fingers from hip bone to hip bone, relishing the warmth of her skin and the silky feel of her panties sliding across the top of my hand.
Finally, I could wait no longer, and when I shifted my movement downward, the exhale of breathe from Sarah suggested she felt the same way. My fingertips found the top of her slit, and then followed it downward until I cupped her tiny pussy. Sarah, in an instinctive act of submission eventually learned at some age by girls the world over, parted her legs to make space, giving herself over to me.
Though I was incredibly aroused, and not particularly rational, I can honestly say I paused yet again to consider the moment. I was no longer troubled by the shame and the guilt, and too impassioned to realize that those feeling would return later in earnest. No, instead I was in complete and utter amazement.
I was naked in bed with this pretty twelve year old girl, who I loved and protected as my own, and admired in ways she would never know, my mouth on her bare breast, my hand down her pants covering her hairless pussy. There was nothing wrong about this moment. There was no consideration that I was a grown man and she was a pre-teen girl.
This was pure love and adoration, from which is born the greatest passion, and pure passion is what I felt. I wanted this tender young girl, and I needed her. I felt more love and more devotion in my heart than I had ever known, and it only served to make my cock throb incessantly, my lips to suckle more urgently, and my fingers to explore sweet, untouched flesh more tenderly. Heaven could take me now, my life was complete.
Nothing to this point in my experience compared to what I felt. As Sarah squirmed under my touch, sighs of pleasure now escaping her lips, I realized that this pretty young girl, who sadness had enveloped for so long, was in truth a sensual being, and was offering herself to me as her first. And I knew what I had to do next.
Pulling my hand from her pants, I hooked my thumb into the elastic of her shorts and pushed down. She lifted up without hesitation, and one-handed once again I removed her shorts and panties. Tossing them on the floor with her shirt, I was fully aware that we were now both completely naked, in bed together, and for the first time I longed for a light so I could see her.
Instead of returning to her breasts, I sought out Sarah's lips and we kissed deeply as my hand went straight to her pussy. Marveling at the smoothness of a pussy that had not yet grown hair, I left Sarah's lips and began kissing down her neck once again, my next goal firmly fixed in my mind. Sarah cooed softly as I lightly brushed her breasts, then she stiffened yet again when I passed them up and kissed down across her abdomen.
She now knew what was coming. My tongue delved into her belly button, causing her to squirm in ticklish response, then continued south. When I reached her hips, I paused. Pushing Sarah's thighs apart, I moved between her legs, kneeling. In the faint light I looked up her body, but all I could see was outline, the detail obscured. Her legs were spread wide to make room for me, but her hips were girlishly narrow. She had wide shoulders, and I could see that her head was lifted as she also tried to look back at me.
Try as I might, I could not see her breasts clearly, yet it was a deliciously enticing image, and I soaked it in. But my patience was slipping. Easing my hands under Sarah's thighs, I reached around and took a slender hip in either hand. This caused her knees to bend, and with her legs spread she was open and inviting. When I leaned forward she tensed, but I bypassed her pussy and kissed her lower belly once again, more to prolong the moment for myself than to tease Sarah.
As I licked a trail downward, I marveled at the steep rise from Sarah's stomach to her elevated mons. There was no fat on her body to smooth out the contours, and I carefully kissed around her pussy, exploring and memorizing lest I never travel here again. Sarah squirmed beneath me, clearly trying to move her pussy under my mouth, and I was delighted by her urgency since it matched my own.
I didn't want to hurry, but I was tired of waiting, and with one swift move I gave her what we both wanted. My mouth covered her small pussy and I literally swallowed her whole. I just opened my mouth wide and covered from the top of her slit to as far back as I could reach. Sarah moaned loudly and lifted her hips, pushing herself into my mouth. God, it was beautiful.
I merely held my mouth on her and let her grind against me, incredulous of the desire coming from this pretty young girl. The first time she paused to catch her breath, I upped the ante. Extending my tongue, I traced the tip as deep into her pussy as I could, starting at my lower lip and working upward. At first she recoiled back, as if in shock at the contact, but immediately she pushed back against my face once again.
It occurred to me that in my life I had never performed oral sex on a virgin. I love to go down on my wife, running my tongue deep into the folds of her pussy. But with Sarah, that wasn't possible. I could trace my tongue into the spaces between her pussy lips, exploring every nook and cranny, but I couldn't penetrate deeply, and I found this strangely exciting. I could find the bump that would mature into her clitoris, but I couldn't excite it the same way as I could with my wife. Nevertheless, Sarah was clearly sensitive in this area, and she responded vigorously every time my tongue rubbed her little nub.
Time could have been moving slowly, or it could have been quick, I had no idea. My head was buried between Sarah's firm young thighs, my mouth pressed firmly into her hairless pussy, and I was in bliss. I thought of her stretching on the playing field, myself maneuvering so I could see up her shorts to her panty covered pussy, and then later denying to myself that I had done so. In my wildest dreams I could never have imagined my head between those athletic legs. In my wildest dreams, I could never fathom that sex with Sarah was even a remote possibility.
Any doubts I may have harbored about Sarah's willingness were gone. She ground her hips up into my face with abandon, her tight ass hardly touching the mattress any longer. She was just as charged up as I was, and I released her hips and reached up and took one of her hands into each of mine. With my arms under her parted legs, I was able to use my strength to pull her down into my mouth, increasing the pressure even more.
With my wife, there was never any doubt when she had an orgasm. She literally lost control for a few moments and it was beautiful thing to experience. The best orgasms I gave her were administered orally, a fact I took great pride in. With Sarah, it was quite different. To begin with, I wasn't even certain that a twelve year old girl was mature enough to reach orgasm. What I can tell you though is that a distinct change took place.
One moment Sarah was moaning rhythmically, her fingers entwined with mine, her hips fully off the bed as she ground herself into my mouth. The next moment she collapsed onto the bed, her body limp, her legs casually spread wide, looking for all the world as if she were totally spent. There were none of the cries and groans, the ragged breathing, that I was used to, but I could sense deep satisfaction. Whether she had simply exhausted herself, or whether I had actually helped her reach her first, it was beautiful to behold.
I continued to tenderly lick between Sarah's widely spread legs, unable to give up the treasure I had found. I loved this girl dearly, and I was determined to set the standard by which all boys in her future would be judged. But my own needs were weighing heavily upon me, and I had an idea how to deal with it.
On my hands and knees, I moved up Sarah's body until I was looking straight down into her angelic face. Her eyes were closed, and in the darkness I thought I could detect a look of happiness. I leaned forward to kiss Sarah, and when I did my hard cock rubbed across her belly. Her eyes popped open, and she returned my kiss with nervous delight. After a minute, I broke off the kiss and shifted my body back so that the head of my cock grazed across her pussy. Taking my cock in my hand, I rubbed it against her, feeling her tense up as I enjoyed the magical sensation of my hard member moving through her smooth and saliva slicked pussy.
By my own estimation, and based on the reaction of girls I've known over the years, my cock is above average in size, both in length and thickness. In the darkness I could barely make out the image of it sliding easily through the tight folds of Sarah's pussy, but it was easy to tell that in relative terms, I was quite large and she was quite small. But Sarah was unconcerned. As I applied a little pressure at her opening, Sarah tensed up even more, but never once did she make a move to stop me. If I was inclined to fuck this young girl, to take her virginity, I was certain she was going to allow it.
Even though I was aroused beyond description, more so than I could ever remember, I still held a measure of control, and was fully aware that having already stepped over so many lines, there were others I simply could not cross. My moral make-up, however laughable it may sound at this point, wouldn't allow me to accept the gift of Sarah's virginity, nor would my love for her permit it.
Instead, I positioned my cock along Sarah's pussy, the head at the top of her slit, and then ever so gently I lowered a portion of my weight on to her. I wanted to feel what it was like, and I wanted her to know how it felt to take the mass of a man between her legs. Using my elbows and my knees to carry most of my weight, I lowered my chest to feel her breasts against me, and brought my face to within inches of Sarah's. As I stared into her wide open eyes, I could tell that Sarah still expected me to enter her. I couldn't say for sure that she wanted it, only Sarah held that knowledge, but I knew she would let it happen. It only made me love her more.
As I covered her lips with my own, I began to slowly rub my cock back and forth over Sarah's pussy. There was eagerness in her kisses, and I was overjoyed when her arms came around my neck. Although it was not entirely comfortable trying to hold my weight off Sarah, the sensation of laying on her, slowly going through the motions of love-making, were overwhelming. As I rubbed against her more vigorously, she caught on and began to grind back, raising her hips as she had done when I was going down on her. When her legs wrapped around my thighs, I had to marvel at the way she instinctively assumed the proper position for a good, sound fucking.
Laying on a naked Sarah, her arms and legs wrapped around me, her tiny breasts pushing into my chest, and her narrow hips pressed into me by her strong thighs, I knew what it felt like to be her lover, and it was quickly pushing me to my limits. My hips were now pumping back and forth as I ground my hard cock along the length of Sarah's pussy. My breathing was labored and I could no longer hold her kiss, instead my head dropping to the pillow beside her own. I doubted that Sarah knew what to expect, but she clearly understood that we were building up to something. And then it happened. I suddenly let out a low moan, and then come erupted from my cock, splattering across both Sarah's stomach and my own.
It was an intense orgasm, and I almost collapsed on Sarah before I caught myself. My cock was pulsing out come and I was certain that Sarah could feel every spasm through her pussy. If she was surprised to feel my hot come boiling out onto her belly, she didn't let it show. Sarah clung to me, her arms and legs tight around my body, which only served to intensify my pleasure.
Finally I was done, and though I did not want to, I had to move off Sarah so I could let my weight down on the bed. Beside her, I was still breathing heavily as I kissed her cheek and her ear, my hands back at her small but erotic chest. She had the sheen of sweat across her body, and I had to smile. Then, in an act that seemed crude in comparison to the beautiful time we had just shared, I reached to the floor for her T-shirt and used it to clean up the mess I had made. Then I snuggled in next her, holding her close in reassurance. Not a word had passed between us, and not a word needed to be said now.
After about ten minutes, as the guilt and shame began to wash over me, I thought unkindly of the clichВ that a hard cock had no conscience. Glancing at the clock, it was nearly 3 AM. Did I damage this child in the last three hours? Did I ruin my own life? Sarah lay flat on her back, her head on my left arm, and the rhythm of her breathing told me she had drifted off to sleep.
In the darkness, I could see the outline of her slender body, and even as I felt guilty I could not resist the urge to lightly trace my fingers along her length. But that was wrong, and I chastised myself. Feeling shameful and afraid, I thought to get up and move to the other bed, but at the same time I was concerned that to do so would definitely hurt Sarah's feelings. Before I could figure out the correct thing to do, I drifted off to sleep as well.
I awoke at 6:30, the faint light of morning filtering in through the heavy curtains. Sarah and I were totally entwined, sleeping as lovers, and as we slept we had pulled the covers over ourselves. Her face was serene in the low light, and though I still could not see her deliciously slender body, my arms were wrapped around it. In my half-awake state, I loved the feel of her, and it only took a few minutes until my cock began to grow again. This jarred me awake, and the guilt and the fear returned in earnest. Untangling myself from Sarah, I slipped out of bed, grabbed my clothes, and headed for the bathroom.
I had the shower on for several minutes and the room was steaming up. I was standing naked in front of the sink, leaning on the counter, looking at my own reflection as it disappeared in the fog, wondering what the hell I could have been thinking, when the door opened. Sarah stood there, clearly surprised to see me, and I realized she assumed I was in the shower. For the first time I saw her naked and it took my breath away.
Her small breasts were beautiful, rising up from the flatness of her breastplate more than I expected. Her stomach was as muscled as I well knew, and her hips narrow and girlish. Her thighs looked very strong, as did her claves, the muscles firm under sun darkened skin. And her small hairless pussy rose up from her flat abdomen invitingly. I gawked openly, not alert enough to realize how quickly I forgot the overwhelming shame I was feeling but a moment ago, my mind focused instead on the way she stared back at my own nakedness.
Reading the situation, I asked, 'were you planning on joining me?'
Sarah simply nodded, and I felt an instant stirring in my groin. For the first time, I thought of the boys in the other room and realized we shouldn't waste time, even though I could have stood there and stared at her naked beauty without tiring. It never even occurred to me not to do it.
Stepping past Sarah, I locked the door between the rooms. Then I took her hand and pulled the curtain aside. At first I simply held her close, feeling her tender body against my own as the hot water poured over us and my cock hardened against her groin. When I finally pushed her back to kiss her, my heart skipped a beat as her two hands immediately slipped between us and took hold of my member. I had noted earlier her lack of shyness about touching me, but circumstances were such that we never got back to it, yet I had no regrets. Now, feeling her hands on my rock hard cock was remarkable, and I simply stood there and let her explore.
Sarah's inexperienced hands were clumsy but eager, and she rubbed all round my cock and even fondled my balls, much to my enjoyment. She figured out how to stroke me on her own, and I had to wonder if this was instinctive, or mimicry of something she had seen. Her lack of technique was irrelevant, far over-powered by the sensory overload that my mind, and its awareness of what we were doing, provided. I was in no hurry, to say the least, and neither was she, but I knew time was limited.
I turned Sarah so she faced away from me and the showerhead, and then backed her under the water to fully wet her hair. Then with a generous portion of shampoo, I tenderly washed Sarah's hair, allowing my fingers to gently massage her scalp. Rinsing her clean, I repeated the process with conditioner, as Sarah stood passively and let me serve her.
I pushed her away slightly, then took a bar of soap and began to build up lather between my two hands. For the first time I was able to admire her from the back, strong and narrow in the waist, then flaring ever so slightly around a tiny little butt, and I drank it in. Then I began to wash her, starting at her shoulders and working my way down.
There could be no experience to compare with standing naked and hard in a hot shower as I bathed a pretty twelve year old girl. My hands traced every square inch of Sarah's body, using the soap as an excuse. Kneeling behind her to wash her lower legs and feet, my eyes were fixed on her ass, and my hands quickly joined them. Kneading her ass cheeks, my finger slipped down her crack until I found her tiny asshole. As I rubbed her anus, and lightly pressed inward, Sarah offered only a sigh in response. My cock throbbed in appreciation.
Still kneeling, I turned her around and found myself face-to-face with her sweet little pussy. Repeating the routine, I washed my way up her legs, but I couldn't break my eyes away from my object of desire. Sarah's thighs felt remarkably strong under my hands, and then my hands were on her pussy, washing her inside and out as my fingers explored her intimately. Finally I rose up and worked my way to her glorious breasts. So young and sweet, I couldn't resist the urge to tenderly kiss each one before I smothered them in soap suds.
With great reluctance I switched places with Sarah and rinsed the conditioner from her hair and the soap from her body. Once again my hands covered every inch of her, as I turned her under the spray. When I was done, I was delighted to see her reach for the shampoo.
It was almost comical that I had to kneel, and it's possible she got more soap in my eyes than my hair, but I wouldn't have stopped her no matter what. Rinsed clean I stood, and she mimicked my earlier actions, starting at my shoulders and working her way down, only moving much quicker. She even probed at my ass, much to my delight. However, she had a target in mind and had me turn. Washing my body quickly, she then focused on my hard cock, lathering me up with obvious relish. I watched in wonder as her small hands stroked my manhood and fondled my balls, certain she was an angel from heaven.
Feeling the urgency of time, I had to end it before I was ready, stepping under the spray as Sarah rubbed the soap from my body. When she unexpectedly knelt before me and kissed the end of my cock, the shock I felt was real, and it would be much later that I would figure out she had actually seen her mother do this, and knew from that experience that it was something a guy liked. I was stunned to learn this, but not nearly as stunned as when I watched her open her mouth and cover the end of my cock. The warm wetness of her mouth was incredible, and the moan that slipped from my lips came from the heart.
Sarah could only take a small portion of my cock into her youthful mouth, but she took all she could and the gleam in her eyes as she looked up at me told me she was as excited as I. To be frank, her technique was not that good and I jumped several times when her teeth scraped across my highly sensitized glans, but I resisted the urge to guide her and let her find her own way. And find it she did, as her hands wrapped greedily around the base of my throbbing cock. Perhaps it was the shear joy of having this beautiful twelve year old girl so eagerly sucking my dick, but I forgot all concerns for time, and my numerous charges in the adjoining room.
In the end, it didn't really matter, for after only a few minutes, I felt my arousal rising to a peak. My first impulse was to fight it off, to prolong pleasure I may never experience again, but I was rational enough to realize I did not have such luxury, and I let nature take its course. As my cock began to swell, Sarah sensed the change, but I knew she had no idea what to expect. And as badly as I may have wanted it, I knew I couldn't come in her mouth. So at the last moment, I pulled myself from her warm mouth and guided the tip of my cock downward just as my knees buckled and my come burst out.
At first Sarah tried to follow my cock with her mouth, but when she felt my warm come hit her chest she stopped. My own hand wrapped around hers, I held my cock as one salvo after another covered her beautiful tiny breasts. All I could do was watch in amazement as Sarah stared up into my face and let me spill my come across her body. It was over much too quickly, and I thought I must look ridiculous to her, my knees bent, my hand on my cock, and my mouth hanging open, but the sensations were so intense there was nothing I could do.
When I removed my hand, Sarah resumed stroking me, her eyes riveted on my softening manhood. Finally the time factor occurred to me, and I took her by the arms and lifted her to her feet. There was no telling how long we had been in the shower, and I needed to act, but as I looked into Sarah's innocent eyes, then followed the trail of my come as it ran off her small chest and down to her pussy, I was mesmerized. When my cock began incredibly to stir once more, I suddenly grabbed the soap and moved Sarah into the spray of water, gently washing her down one last time.
I dried off first, as my eyes feasted on my naked young lover dripping as she stood in the tub, seemingly in no hurry to get out. It occurred to me that hardly a word had passed between us all night, and I had a thousand questions I wanted to ask, but I could linger no longer, no matter how inviting she looked, and wrapping a towel around my waist I slipped out of the bathroom. As I quickly dressed, I heard stirring next door, so I rubbed my hair as dry as possible and slipped on a hat, trying to hide the fact I just stepped from the shower. A new wave of guilt washed over me as I unlocked the door between the adjoining rooms, but it was easily suppressed as I got busy rousing the boys and getting them moving.
A short time later, we were in the lobby eating a continental breakfast, the kids now in uniforms and ready for action. Sarah looked radiant this morning, but she kept to herself as usual, and she hardly spoke as usual. I avoided her eyes, unable to stop the guilt I was filling, and certain the other two parents could look at the two of us and detect that something had happened. It was totally irrational, but a guilty conscience does not lead to sane thinking.
There was another factor that troubled me, that I had selfishly hurt the entire team. We played the unbeaten, reigning state champion first, and thanks to my lack of self control my star player got little sleep.
As it turned out, I had no need for worry. We played exceptionally well and after falling behind in the first half, drew level three minutes into the second on a hard-earned goal from Sarah's counterpart at forward. The entire second half we attacked, and our opponent withered under the constant barrage as their earlier confidence and cockiness turned to looks of worry. Yet we couldn't finish, at least until the end.
In the final minute, Sarah scored an awesome goal from 30 yards out, curling it in at the far post. But a bad call by the referee negated the game winner, and we ended in a draw. In the final analysis, however, the reigning state champs knew they survived on a bad call, and we had served notice.
Our second game against the so-called number one contender was a cake walk, as we put them away 4-1, with Sarah slotting in two much to their dismay. Throughout the day, I struggled with my guilt, but as I watched Sarah play, her game not diminished in the least, I was pleased to observe she was handling the situation much better than I was. And though I was inwardly troubled, it was a joyous group of players and parents I took to dinner that evening, and it was impossible not to get caught up in the excitement of the day.
We finished an early dinner and headed back to the hotel for an early night since we had the first game on the schedule the following day. A win in the morning, and we would move directly to the championship, and everyone was talking about it. As the evening wore on, I was distracted by other thoughts. Part of me hoped for a repeat of the previous night, and part of me prayed it didn't happen. As we set up camp once again, however, I harbored no particular expectations. I would not put any pressure on Sarah.
As it turned out, it wasn't necessary. The boys were all in bed, and I had set the alarms and turned in myself, while Sarah was in the bathroom for her nightly routine. I had the television on, and was studiously ignoring her when she exited the bathroom, determined not to show any expectation whatsoever. But as she approached her bed, then came around the end of it, I glanced up and saw by the light of the television that she was stark naked. Awestruck, it was as if I had seen her for the first time, and I stared openly at her beautiful, lithe form. Without a word she kept walking towards me, and I threw the covers back and welcomed her into my bed.
Within minutes, at Sarah's urging, I was also naked once again, and we curled up together like comfortable lovers. This time we did talk for a few minutes, and she shared a few things about her mom, but when it quickly became apparent this saddened her, I silenced her with a kiss that she eagerly returned.
When I clicked off the television, and despite my attempts to claim otherwise, the evidence that I hoped for a repeat occurrence became readily apparent. I had carefully left the curtains ajar, so that the lights from the parking lot filtered in through the sheers. It took only a few minutes for my eyes to adjust, the result being that tonight I could see my beautiful treasure. We kissed and fondled each other, my cock quite hard as I squeezed Sarah's ass and kissed trails around her neck. She had a hand on my rigid dick, and she began to rub me against her slit provocatively.
Then with my glans wedged between her labia, she began to press downward, at first gently, but then quite hard. Even though we were lying on our sides and it was awkward, her intent was not lost on me, and though I was tempted otherwise, I shifted position to change the focus. Spinning around 180 degrees, I positioned myself so I was looking directly at Sarah's pretty hairless pussy, while at the same time presented her with my hard member.
Neither of us wasted any time, as I extended a tongue to her pussy and Sarah covered my cock with her sweet mouth. It only took a few minutes before I had her left leg over my shoulder as we lay on our side, which exposed her entire pussy to my lips and tongue. We stayed like this for a long time, while I alternated between savoring the sweet silky smoothness of Sarah's pussy, and the warm eagerness of her mouth.
I rolled over onto my back, carrying Sarah's light body with me, so that she ended on top, and I pulled her back so she was full on my face. Since her body was shorter than mine, this meant she could only get my cock head in her mouth, but I didn't care, I had a heavenly feast before me, and Sarah's hands stayed busy where her mouth couldn't reach.
Laying my head back, the light from the window revealed a marvelous view of Sarah's bare bottom open and exposed for me. I ran my hands across her ass cheeks as I admired the smooth tightness of her pussy and her tender pink asshole. Then I traced a tongue along Sarah's slit all the way up. When I ran my tongue over her anus, Sarah nearly jumped off the bed. She didn't pull away, and she made no move to stop me, so I repeated the process over and over.
It's impossible to explain how I felt as I traced my tongue along the most intimate places on the beautiful underage girl, it was so incredibly arousing, but I knew I would never be able to look at her again without remembering it. And I suspected Sarah was going to remember it as well, for she had forgotten my cock, holding it loosely in her hand as she pressed back against my oral explorations. Her back curled up and her head tilted back as my hands roamed across her chest, the tension in her body clear beneath my fingers.
As before, Sarah did not reach an obvious orgasm, and I can't say for sure that it happened. Repeating the process of the night before, she simply went limp as if the wind had been removed from her sails. Maybe she ran out of energy, or maybe she came, it didn't matter. She was obviously quite happy as she lay atop me while I continued to lick tenderly at her pussy. Gradually her mouth returned to my cock, sucking my glans between her lips, and for the longest time we simply lay there in a lazy 69, licking and kissing each other in the most intimate manner.
Sarah was the first to stir, and she slowly rose up, and then extracted her pussy from my untiring mouth. She turned, and then settled on top of me, her lips coming to mine, her directness making me yearn for her even more. We kissed with passion as she settled over my cock, her hand moving between us to guide me once again to her pussy.
I was instantly alert, but made no move to stop her as she tried with amateurish style to mount me. She had me lined up properly, but the combination of my size and her inexperience made it impossible, though she was slow to accept this. Her frantic efforts both aroused me and tore at my heart until I did what I knew I had to do; I stopped her.
The muted light from the window was now in Sarah's face, and the hurt showed instantly. She wanted me to fuck her, and I wanted so badly to do it, but I couldn't, and now I had hurt her feelings.
'We shouldn't do that, baby.'
Sarah didn't speak and it appeared she wasn't listening either.
'It's too early in your life for you to offer such a gift. And I'm not the right person to be first. I love you too much to take that from you.'
It was from the heart, but even I knew it was inadequate. Sarah softened, but the disappointment still showed, tearing at my heart. That's when I changed gears and lightened the moment, uttering the words that would prove to be so fateful.
'I'll make you a deal. When you turn 15, if you still feel the same way about me, then come see me.'
This seemed to satisfy Sarah, and she eased back slightly and lowered her pussy over my hard cock, which was now laying flat against my belly. Privately I congratulated myself, knowing full well that Sarah would meet a guy in the next two and a half years and totally forget about me. My self-congratulation was cut short, however, as Sarah began to grind her pussy back and forth across my cock. It was a repeat of the previous night, except that Sarah was now on top, and I lay back and admired her as she worked herself fervently against me, incredulous of such raw sexual energy from a pre-teen girl.
She placed her hands flat on my chest, close together, so that her upper arms pressed her small breasts together, making them appear larger than they were. Her eyes were closed and mouth was slightly open, and as she pushed herself almost vertical, I could look around her arms and see her hairless pussy smothering my dick as she slid back and forth. It was beautiful to behold.
It only to me a short while until the combination of friction and visual stimulation pushed me over the edge, and for the third time Sarah made me come. My cock erupted, spraying come halfway up my body, and Sarah sat up straight as she continued to rub against me and watched in amazement. I lifted my hips against her as pulse after pulse passed through my member and my come spurted out. The groan from my lips was involuntary, the pleasure intense. Finally I collapsed back onto the bed, and Sarah quickly collapsed on top of me, her lips finding mine, not caring that my come was now rubbing between us.
I awoke some time later, Sarah still asleep on top of me. Glancing at the clock, I figured I had been out for about an hour, and it was now after midnight. Slowly, I tried to move Sarah without waking her and found that we were literally stuck together, which made me chuckle. I managed to turn her around and lay her head on a pillow with out causing her to fully awaken, then toyed with the idea of moving to the other bed before I admitted to myself I had no intention of doing so. With a deep sigh of satisfaction I settled in next to my little naked darling, and drifted back to sleep.
My mental clock served me well in the morning and I woke up at five. Slipping out of bed, I considered the possibility of a repeat in the shower before deciding the risk was too great with the early game. Instead I walked around to the space between the beds and looked down on Sarah, angelic as she slept. Knowing it was evil, but unable to resist, I slipped the covers back so I could see her, slowly pushing them down so she was totally uncovered.
She surprised me by rolling over onto her back, and I thought she had awakened, but then she settled back into a deep slumber, her body fully exposed to me. My cock started to swell as I reached for the lamp between the beds, marveling at the vitality this young girl brought out in me. I felt like a teen-ager again.
Sarah was flat on her back, her head turned away from the light. Her left arm, the one nearest me, lay limp at her side. Her right arm was bent so that her hand was under her cheek as if adding substance to her pillow. Her left leg was straight out, but the right was bent at the knee, the effect being that her pussy was fully exposed to my gaze.
She was a thing of absolute beauty, and my cock quickly grew to it's full-length as my hand idly stroked back and forth. In this position, Sarah's breasts were nearly flat except for the budding nipples, which reached upward proudly. Her stomach was hard and flat, her hips narrow with prominent hip bones. Her mons rose enticingly, and her smooth, girlish pussy took my breath away yet again. Just the thought of having licked her pussy drove me wild, and I quickly approached orgasm.
It happened fast, and I didn't even think about my actions. Suddenly I was coming, and I moved forward a half step to ensure my come landed on Sarah's breasts. Then stroke after stroke I forced my come from my cock as I directed it up and down Sarah's body, from her nipples to her pussy and back. When I was done, she had milky white pools across most of her body, but never awoke. I was breathless. It was a nasty thing to do, but incredibly arousing and beautiful at the same time. As I stared at her, I knew that if I had a camera I would use it, and I was glad one wasn't available.
When I returned from the shower, Sarah had pulled the covers back over herself, and it was with great reluctance that I woke her up. At first groggy, she smiled widely as she came fully awake, slipping out of bed to hug me with no shyness whatsoever about her nudity, and seemingly no knowledge of the come bath that had been wiped away by the sheets. I watched her pad off to the bathroom, wondering if I would ever see her naked again.
Breakfast was a repeat of the day before in that I felt all eyes were on me, but the urgency to get the team fed and to the fields quickly caused all other thoughts to slip away. We won our game with ease, and then watched the following game anxiously as it would decide our opponent. In the end the worry was for naught as we were declared co-champions, along with the team we tied the previous day, after the final was washed out by a major thunderstorm.
Once I returned home, the events of the weekend seemed to be a dream. My wife found my distraction annoying, but it took me over a week to shake it off. As we returned to normal patterns, with Sarah reacting no differently to me at practice, except perhaps to smile more, and since no angry parents or police showed up at my house, I began to accept what happened, and even enjoy the memory privately. Sarah and I did not get together again, but it was easy to see there was no way to do so without attracting attention, which I found to be both a relief and a frustration.
In the spring we won state, and over the summer I helped Sarah work her way onto a premier girl's team in a neighboring town, one where the quality of coaching and overall exposure was sure to enhance her future opportunities. It was a difficult decision, and I missed her presence dearly, but never missed a game she played in if it was possible to go. We remained good friends, and I often got chances to see down her blouse and up her shorts, knowing full well it was now on purpose.
All that was more than two years ago. The loss of my wife had effectively wiped those memories from my mind, but now as I stood at the door, staring at a beautiful and expectant Sarah on her fifteenth birthday, it all came back in a rush. Every last detail was vivid once again. I knew why she was here, and it left me speechless.
Sarah was smiling but pensive, and my hesitation and silent reverie served only to increase her anxiety. I knew she was thinking she had made a huge mistake, and was calculating the best means to extract herself from what was quickly becoming an awkward situation. My shock that she had remembered my promise, and was here with an offer of unimaginable magnitude, was further complicated by the fact that I been celibate for more than a year. It had been a long time since I had even considered that love was possible again, and the emotions were nearly overwhelming, but I suddenly realized one thing with absolute clarity. I did not intend to let her leave.
Reaching out once again, I took Sarah's hand and turned back towards the door to lead her inside. The relief that washed over her was palpable, and I knew that at least for Sarah's sake, I had made a good decision. And probably for my own as well, though my uncertainty was great, and my faith in my emotions was nil.
I led Sarah the few steps along the hall to my bedroom door, and turned inside. Stopping at the foot of my bed, I faced her and kissed her tentatively. It was a simple peck, but the fresh scent of Sarah, and the warmth of her lips, made my head swim. If I ever had a chance to know love again, Sarah could make it happen, she could help me heal. One small kiss, and I knew it. One small kiss, and my forgotten passion for her was back.
Recalling one of the most memorable aspects of our previous time together, I didn't speak, and to my pleasure neither did she. Instead, with unexpected confidence, and without a thought for the friends who were awaiting my arrival, I reached for the top button on Sarah's dress as I stared into her eyes.
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